Posted on May 18, 2011

The global population explosion and resultant food shortage or high prices for food should be front page news.  But a single baby bump? We should have ennui at the sight of a baby bump since the days when we followed anthropologists into the jungle and ogled photos of  nude  native populations the world over – many pregnant.  However, we soon convinced them to cover up – like the exotic Massai:

So why all the fuss?   We’ve seen it before.  But trust Hollywood to bring back nude natives.  Demi Moore started the baby bump boom:

But a nude shot isn’t for everyone.  But how that bump is covered, well, some are more successfully than others.  Take for example this celebrity who eschewed the warning not to wear stripes east to west.  This isn’t a baby bump she is hiding, this has to be a baby- possibly a year old hidden under her top.

Brit soap star Hannah Waterman

And what about leaving Carla Bruni alone until she makes a formal announcement.  She is at an age of  high risk pregnancy.  She is also in Paris with pariah press.

And where’s the equality in all of this?  Is there a pot watch on men?  Or a bald spot layout unless you are poor Prince William?  No.  But if you are a pregnant celebrity, even without a bump yet, you are changed from Miss or Mrs. or Ms to “a pregnant….boarded a plane….”

Now the other thing watched is pregnancy footwear.  Posh and others still sport their stilts.  Hey, press, let’s make a fashion statement so all the world will endanger themselves and their baby by wearing stilettos during pregnancy:

Spice Girl Mel B

She even tempts fate for a fall by tackling a speed bump [speed bumps are not news worthy.]
If there is a dearth of bumps then the press encourages the creation of one.  Who do they usually pick on?  Of course.  Brangelina.
Leave the poor ladies alone.  Go whale watching.  They feel like them in the final days and they really don’t want to be photographed at the food store or sunning in the back yard.
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