Fallout From That Wierd Wedding in Monaco Continues

Posted on July 15, 2011

As Charlene Wittstock glided down the aisle to tearfully wed Prince Albert of Monaco, it was like watching someone going that last mile to the death chamber.  It was like watching a movie we suddenly realize is actually a horror movie with a deranged male lead.  Bride as victim emerges.

The honeymoon was supposed to change things but then it was revealed that for part of it, the couple slept separately because Albert had to attend an early morning meeting and needed to be in a hotel that was at hand rather than down the possibly congested road, the story took a turn for the worse.  That weak explanation failed.  Dozens of pictures of the two kissing could not set it right.

Now the hapless hero has arranged to take his bride on a second honeymoon to an undisclosed vacation location.  This is truly horrific.  One wonders about the safety of this bride now that she will be alone with Albert.  Monaco and Albert have fallen from grace.  Coverage of the reasons for and possible destinations of the royal couple make one wince.  Less press is more in this case:

Reports of Albert’s alleged philandering had driven Charlene, a former Olympic swimmer, to try to run away from Monaco three times before their wedding, which has led many royal commentators in France questioning whether the £55 million wedding was a complete sham.

Charlene is known to be deeply upset about upcoming DNA tests which will establish if Albert has any more illegitimate children to add to the two he already has.

Despite the revelations, the Palace insisted that the couple had now headed off on a ‘secret’ honeymoon, away from the inquisitive eyes of the world’s media and sceptics.

‘It was suggested that they had returned home to Monaco last Friday, but in fact they are still travelling in South Africa,’ the source added.

Results of the DNA tests have not been released during the couple’s South Africa trip because Charlene could have refused to return to Monaco if they pointed towards Albert having been unfaithful.

Ah, well, his truly serene and beautiful mother actually slept around in Hollywood before she ran off with that dowdy prince of Monaco.  At the time, people cringed a bit at that.  Then Grace tried to raise her children in Monaco, the casino capital of the world.  That was not easy and then she was off to an early death leaving her misguided 3 offspring to their own devices.  Princess Caroline was first married to the playboy of the western world, Princess Stephanie has been married to a circus performer and Albert has celebrated bachelorhood until his recent marriage.  It was to be expected, then, for the world to witness the horror of a wedding at Monaco to which we have just been subjected.  Question:  if this couple were adopting, would they be allowed to raise a child?
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